May 2013
iceepr1ncess:
literally nothing feels better than being loved by someone who hates everyone
year is 2392
child: mommy i can't sleep
mother: don't worry child. lay down as i sing you this ancient lullaby, passed on through my family for generations
mother: WALK INTO THE CLUB LIKE WHAT UP, I GOT A BIG COCK
fricksatmywindow:
my parents don’t realize that i am perfectly happy avoiding humanity
assiest:
life is full of little surprises, for example:
‘dog food lid’ when read backwards is ‘dildo of god’
truly amazing
people-should-all-be-onions:
mydarlingangelgabriel:
Snape, Snape, Severus Snape, DUMBLEDORE
#why do we all know exactly what is happening in this post
hey bud *wraps you up in a blanket* i know today might have been hard for you *ruffles your hair* but you made it through the day *boops your nose* you’re doing such a good job *kisses your forehead* and i am so proud of you